inside the mind of a linux admin

fun with outsourced support: Sprint

Erik

Saturday, January 29, 2011

comedy & funny ha ha

1 Comment

Mike: Hello, I’m a Sprint order specialist. I specialize in setting up new
wireless accounts. Are there any questions I may help answer for you
today?
You: will my phone be activated when i get it
Mike: I would be glad to assist you about your new phone details.
Mike: Let’s move this chat and make it a window of its own. It will be out
of the way and I can stay with you in case you have any questions or any
concerns. Just click on the “Yes” button below and we can continue.
Mike: Simply click on the white “Yes” button below and we can continue.
Mike: Thank you for moving the chat. Just to check, are you currently a
Sprint customer?
You: uh yeah
Mike: That’s great to hear!
You: great!
You: are you sprint customer?
Mike: Could you please confirm you are upgrading your phone or purchase a
phone with new plan?
Mike: I am online Sprint Order Specialist.
You: So, you don’t have a sprint cell phone?
Mike: I am sorry, I can not tell you about personnel information.
You: So, you don’t have a sprint cell phone?
Mike: I would be happy to help you to place an order online and happy to
answer your questions.
You: It’s not “personnel” information, it’s “personal” information.
Mike: Okay.
Mike: I don’t have Sprint phone currently.
You: Thank you. Do you prefer Verizon? I’ve recently learned they offer
free upgrades.
Mike: You are welcome.
You: That’s really all I want. My current sprint phone cannot even dial
out, the blackberry’s have soured.
Mike: Sprint also offer you free upgrades phone if you are eligible for
full upgrade saving.
You: I should be eligible for “full upgrade saving”
Mike: I you upgrade your phone online today, you should receive your phone
inactive mode.
You: Why would I want a phone in inactive mode?
Mike: You can activate your phone online or contacting with our Customer
Care.
You: You do not care?
Mike: The phone would be inactive mode because if you would get your new
phone in active mode your current phone services would be stopped for the
time.
Mike: Your 1 phone can be active at one time.
You: That’s perfectly fine. My “1 phone” is useless.
You: When I press send, it says no.
Mike: You can activate a device by visiting Sprint.com/Activate and
following the on screen prompts.
You: It vibrates when I receive messages, but hell if I know what they
are.
Mike: I can understand your concern.
Mike: Please let me check your phone upgrade eligibility.
You: is that why you do not use sprint phones?
You: I’m not impressed, either.
Mike: In the future, you can visit www.sprint.com/upgrades to check your
upgrade eligibility but I would be happy to check it for you right now.
Can you please provide me with your billing ZIP code and phone number to
confirm your eligibility?
You: 234** 757-***-****
You: Can you please provide me with your billing ZIP code and phone number
to confirm your eligibility?
Mike: Thank you for your patience.
You: No, thank you.
Mike: Congratulations! You are eligible to receive a savings of $150 with
an instant rebate and with a two-year contract extension, or receive a $75
instant rebate with a one-year contract extension. By upgrading online
today, we will waive your shipping and handling charges and the $18
activation fee.
You: Did you just type all of that???
Mike: Yes,
You: surrreee
You: Well thanks!
You: Thanks Mike!
You: Where are you located?
Mike: I am located in India.
You: SPRINT HAS MIKES IN INDIA?
Mike: Yes, You are right.
You: What’s your real name… Seriously.
You: Maybe we can be penpals.
Mike: My name is Mahesh
You: That’s a beautiful name. Why do they make call yourself Mike?
Mike: I am sorry, I don’t have information about that.
You: 🙁
You: Okay Mahesh
You: What do you do for fun over there?
Mike: I am sorry, I can not tell you anything from here about me at this
time.
You: I’m sorry Mahesh, I didn’t mean to pry
You: so lets get down to business.
Mike: Alright.
You: So this upgrade… I can get any phone I WANT?
Mike: Yes, You can upgrade your phone with available phones on the Sprint
website.
Mike: Are there any particular features you will like your phone to have?
You: Well, I was looking at them before your sexy ass popped up on my
screen
You: and I want the EVO
You: The shift one
Mike: Excellent Choice!
You: So I can get that upgrade for free?
Mike: Unfortunately, we don’t have offers on the HTC Evo Shift for free
upgrades currently.
Mike: But we have other great phones available online.
You: Oh Mahesh you are breaking my heart
You: You said it was excellent, we have good taste
You: why can’t I upgrade ?
Mike: We offer you 3G best phones for free upgrades with 2 years contract.
Mike: Please have a look Samsung Seek phone.
Mike: We also offer you free activation and shipping.
You: Seek sheet
You: I know you wouldn’t settle for a seek Maheesh
You: I’ll pay for activation and shipping on the EVO shift
You: and I’ll pay to ship you here
You: Over here, beautiful fair skinned women dance atop tables and slide
up and down polls for nothing less than a dollar!
Mike: I can understand your concern.
You: Do you?
Mike: Would you like to place an order online today?
You: OK
Mike: The Checkout page will ask you to provide additional information.
Please take your time and let me know if you have any questions.
You: What are you wearing?
Mike: I am sorry, as I can not tell you anything.
You: mmmmm
You: I love a good mystery.
You: Can you at least tell me what the difference is between 3G and 4G?
Mike: I apologize for your frustration and I do want to help you. I would
like to ask that we approach this issue professionally. I assure you that
I will assist you as much as I possibly can.
You: I agree
Mike: 3G and 4G is a speed of the Internet.
You: I have FIOS
You: Is that 4G?
Mike: It’s also indicate new generation of the Internet.
You: Does G stand for gigabyte or gangsta?
Mike: G stands for the Generation.
You: Damn Facebook
You: They lie.
You: So, 4th generation internet?
You: Is that the same as Al Gore’s internet?
Mike: Fourth Generation (4G) is the next generation of wireless networks
that will complement third Generation (3G).
You: oooo
Mike: 4G gives you an average download speed of 3 to 6 Mbps with peak
download speeds up to 10 Mbps.
You: wow
Mike: 4G has an average upload speed of .5 to 1.0 Mbps with peak upload
speeds up to 5 Mbps.
Mike: Sprint’s 4G network gives you the speed to video conference live
without the lag.
Mike: We’re already set up with 4G coverage in 34 markets. Our 4G speeds
are up to 10 times faster than existing 3G networks.
Mike: You can learn all about 4G speeds, our current devices and coverage
by visiting
Nextel.com/en/solutions/mobile_broadband/mobile_broadband_4G.shtml.
You: So, Sprint invented the fourth generation internet… And that’s
separate from Al Gore’s?
Mike: Additional information about Sprint’s 4G network can be found by
visiting www.Sprint.com/4G.
You: I’ll bookmark that
Mike: Okay.
You: So, can you answer my other question?
You: Is this a separate generation interweb?
Mike: Yes, It’s generation of the Web reception.
You: so it’s not part of Al Gore’s?
Mike: I am sorry, I don’t have information about the AI Gore’s. We have
separate team to help you in this regard.
Mike: I would recommend you please contact our Customer Care Service. They
will be happy to help you. Please give them a call at 1-800-639-6111 for
Nextel and 1-888-211-4727 for Sprint. Timings are Monday to Friday 6 am to
12 am CST and Saturday to Sunday 7 am – 7 pm CST.
You: OMG You have an Al Gore department?
You: Can you transfer me?
Mike: I am sorry, I don’t have access to transfer you from here.
You: But you DO have an Al Gore team?
Mike: Please contact our Customer Care.
You: You don’t care?
Mike: I don’t have information about the AI Gore team and unable to assist
you with this.
Mike: Is there anything else I can help you with today?
You: Okay. I’ll contact Customer care for the Al gore team…
You: What about this upgrade???
You: Stop changing the subject!
Mike: You would no get any free upgrades for the HTC Evo Shift phone.
Mike: not*
You: What if I want to Seek the shit out of the Samsung junk.
Mike: Do you want to upgrade your phone?
You: Do you want to upgrade your phone?
Mike: Okay.
Mike: Thank you for visiting www.sprint.com.
You: Okay.
You: Thank you for visiting www.sprint.com.
You: MAHEESH
Thank you for chatting with us today!

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1 Comment

  • Sunil on Wednesday, February 2, 2011

    I gotta admit, this made me laugh. Poor Mahesh.

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